nepeta leijon: shota whisperer
this isn’t a study date || closed @ abel

[Spoilers: it’s a study date. She’s yet to really comprehend the usefulness of homework, because Nepeta’s a firm believer of doing things to learn them. That’s how hunting works, after all. And life, too, mostly. So why knowing how to write an essay is a skill needed in life is something that escapes her. She’s not one to question Charles or the people he chose to be teachers, though, and it’s a great excuse to spend some time with the bae. Even if it’s in the library, where she can’t prattle on about stuff that happened in district Mu or sector six.]

:33 < so hows that homework coming along huh

[She sits down next to him, placing a paper cup in front of Abel before taking a sip of her own drink. Starbucks is a blessing, because it’s still far too cold for her liking. That’s why the troll puts down the cup and decides to warm her icy paws on her boyfriend’s neck, giggling obnoxiously.]

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tags: + duasaduersas + in which nepeta is a little shit + best girlfriend award goes to

mewmewmage:

excitablecatnip started following you

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( =①ω①=) < DO I SMELL ANOTHER LEIJON IN MY PURRESENCE?????

:33 < that would be me

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tags: + mewmewmage + meulin pls
{ Joint Custody || Mini with Nepeta Leijon }

imperialvviolet:

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TO: arsenicCatnip 
FROM: caligulasAquarium
SUBJ: rodent purchases

[txt]: nep
[txt]: hey nep wwhats up i got a fancy earth phone
[txt]: except by fancy i mean piece of SHIT
[txt]: anywway wwhat are you doin i figured wwe could hang out today

To: :33 < eribubbles
From: NEPETA LEIJON

:33 < wow has it b33n a month already?? time sure flies by!
:33 < plus these earth phones arent that bad even if theyre kinda breakable
:33 < pssh with ‘hanging out’ you really mean buy a chinchilla :PP
:33 < but since i have no homework to do or anything we can totally ‘hang out’

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tags: + imperialvviolet

rancorously:

…. NO COMMENT ON THAT FIRST PART.

LOOK, IN ANY CASE, PUTTING ASIDE YOUR INTENT TO FATTEN ME UP MUCH LIKE THE DARK MAGE DID TO HANSEL IN TIME-TESTED TROLLIAN FOLKTALE, I DON’T KNOW WHAT MY COORDINATES ARE. SOME OF THE SIGNS HERE ARE IN ENGLISH, BUT OTHERS AREN’T, AND I FORGOT MY ULTIMATE SCI-FI ALIEN PACK WITH THE MULTIVERSAL TRANSLATING EQUIPMENT BACK AT THE METEOR.

JUST. FUCKING CHRIST. DO WHATEVER YOU WANT WITH THAT VENISON.

;PP

:33 < of course id want to fatten you up you are way too skinny! if you dont even remember how much youve eaten in the last month then *someone* has to do it for you!
:?? < huh. thats weird. if parts are in english then you have to be somewhere on earth! but earth is kinda big
:33 < doesnt google maps have a tracking feature? i should see about that
:33 < meanwhile ill just k33p it in the fr33zer so it doesnt go bad. plus i could go out and hunt more d33r anyway

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tags: + rancorously

rancorously:

I AM IMMEDIATELY SUSPICIOUS. DOES “SOMETHING NICE” TRANSLATE INTO “SOMETHING THAT WILL PUT ME OUT OF MY IMMEDIATE MISERY, TASTE VAGUELY-ENOUGH LIKE WATER TO MAKE ME WANT MORE OF IT, AND COMES FROM A TOXIC WASTE DUMP?” AM I NEXT ON YOUR LIST OF SUITABLY EDIBLE MEATS?

:33 < well yeah you are but not like that
:33 < moreover if i wanted to put you out of your misery id just punch you in the throat and be done with it
:33 < instead i was going to give you food because i have plenty and if i recall right you said you have a usable transportalizer nearby! i was thinking along the line of smoked venison or something

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tags: + rancorously + g33z karkat not everything i do will lead to your inevitable destruction + usually
N3P3T4 W3 SHOULD GO FOR 1C3 CR34M TH3N H4NG OUT 1N TH3 COOL FOR3ST D1STR1CT >:]

:33 < wow i am so sorry i didnt even get this until now
:33 < but i am so up for that! >:33

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tags: + asks + justicescales + yooooooooo
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tags: + yoooooooo
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tags: + thats my baby
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tags: + look at this adorable motherfucker
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tags: + look eridan its us + im so fucking sorry but this is too good not to reblog

:33 < and people wonder why alternia was ruled by a woman
:33 < boys. i swear
:33 < im so tired i really need to nap

:|| < i gave a fair warning if i have to clean up any guts later on i will honest to goodness punch you two in the face the moment you respawn

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tags: + lookin at u ampora and captor + got my eyes on u fuckers + and now i am off to sleep